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I'm Malia and this is my awesome hilarious journal. I'm short and stuff. I like to sing and write. This is probably my millionth journal. I am in love with Pete. So yeah...this is it I guess.
LoVeLy
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Credits
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
Well, things are officially fixed with Bill and I. It feels awesome. Though, there's still that burn to just talk to him about every possible feeling I might have. But I won't. Well, at least not until Pete cools down about the whole thing.
Yeah, about Pete...ugh. You know, I've been depressed lately. I've just been really down-in-the-dumps and you know...sex is the farthest thing from my mind when I'm feeling like this. Sunday night, something strange happened. For once, I was actually somewhat scared of Pete. I don't even know how to explain it. He was in "the mood" and I totally wasn't. I kept telling him that and I kept telling him to stop and he wouldn't! I got so freaked out! I mean, No means NO! Damn. I've really been considering our relationship lately. He's just been so strange. Like he won't quit doing things that he knows irritates me. I need to have a serious talk with him because some of these things that are going on will not fly with me if we really plan on being together. Now...just how to tell him... And it's not that I'm scared to talk to him about it, it's just the fact that he'll go "ugh hun, you know I was kidding!" and the thing is, I know he was, it just gets REALLY OLD REALLY QUICK! The first 600 times it was a little funny. Now it's just annoying and irritating. I came up with a decision that he is one of the main reasons I've been feeling the way I have. I mean, when we were on that break, I felt great. Besides having all that beef with Bill. But besides that, I had guys complimenting me left and right and I had guys throwing numbers at me. It made me feel good. They said things to me that Pete should say. He really makes me feel like total utter shit sometimes! I need to tell him.
Bruce and I have been planning on working on my song. I can't wait. It's going to be so awesome. The other night, the best lyrics came to me and I wrote them down. Ugh they were awesome! I can't wait to just sing them!
So yeah, I'm supposed to be cleaning right now. So maybe I should stop procrastinating and actually do it!
*~*Malia*~*
